Meet your new coach
No one can make you show up truthfully.
With a horse as your coach, though, you won’t get much accomplished until you do.
There is experiential learning… and then there
are Truth Experiences.
In the summer of 2010, I learned more about myself in two minutes with a large black horse than I had in two years of coach training.
Let me be clear. The experience was not pretty. I wanted to be “in control” and “look good” in front of my buddies. Why the hell I thought I would be able to control a horse when I hadn’t been near one in 20 years is beyond me, but I was totally invested in it at the time.
My ability to control crumbled right into the dirt under my boots. The fortress walls I had built around my heart and ego did, too. My mascara didn’t stand a chance. It was awkward, exposing, and very, VERY eye-opening.
And then it happened – the moment I stopped trying to control and told the truth about how I was feeling (vulnerable, discombobulated, and afraid), the horse began to take interest in what I was doing and let me lead.
Not control. Lead.
The horse was giving me very clear, non-judgmental feedback as to when he wanted to engage – and when he didn’t.
That weekend I redefined and recalibrated, through visceral experience, what effective leadership (in life and in business) looks like for me.
When you learn to lead, set boundaries, and voice your truth with a 1200-pound coaching buddy, you will never forget how to do it with a bunch of humans.
In short, they give direct and honest feedback via their reactions to how you show up and communicate with them. Given that they can’t talk, the language spoken is non-verbal, energetic, and affected by how comfortable you are just being yourself.
Through the eyes of a horse, you are gifted with seeing your blind spots, your bright spots, and how the patterns that show up in the arena play out in other parts of your life.
The interaction with the horse becomes a direct metaphor for your interaction with life.
Do you lead with force and a desire to control? Or with integrity?
Do you set clear, effective boundaries? Or let people walk all over you?
Do you stifle your opinions and compromise your values? Or do you use your voice?
Do you know where you want to go? Or do you simply follow the crowd?
Do you trust your vision? Or believe you can’t manifest your dreams?
These kinds of questions come to the surface.
Then (and here’s my favorite part), you and I get to play with the metaphor until you like how it feels.
Unlike most people, horses don’t care if you were incongruent five minutes ago. They care about what you are doing right now. Communicate clearly and they respond as you envision they will. Become insecure, and they lose interest and explores the grass in the corner of the arena.
You experience on the spot trial and error until you have that visceral “touch point” of how it feels to show up and create what you want.
Learn to set clear and kind boundaries
Practice connection and
Tap into your sense of empowerment
No horse experience is needed and there is no riding involved. I just ask that you show up with an open mind, closed-toed shoes and a readiness to engage.